Paranoid parents

You may even have one. A parent so bent on proving the Internet is made purely for porno and that’s all you’re on there for, that they will breathe down you’re neck constantly.

They like to think they can track what you do effectively too. Ha! It takes twenty seconds to delete every trace of where you’ve been, and if you have a mild intelligence, stopping sites from tracking you as well. History? Cleared it. Cache? Gone. Temporary Internet Files? Out the window. Cookies? Vanished. System32? Deleted, n00b.

Then they like to make you ask them before doing anything, even though they have a clear lack of knowledge about anything computer related. It’s like asking someone morbidly obese how to lose weight. It doesn’t make sense.

And then…OH NOES! They put netnanny on. We are so fucked. Or, you could turn it off and go about your business…nah, just be a pinhead and leave it on.

Not to mention the hypocritical elements of it.

Semi-true story:

“Don’t go on ‘inappropriate’ sites!” The mother warned.

The kid goes and searches his dad’s computer, using the keyword *.jpg.

“Mommy, what’s that lady doing with that golf ball?” He asks, knowing full well, but keeping up the innocent attitude.

Mother flips out. Father claims innocence. Parents fight and divorce each other. We laugh along with the kid.

Now, after all these failed attempts to catch your kid doing something wrong, you’re forced to trust them. Terrible thing, this thing called trust. It’s certainly not important in any relationship, that’s for sure.

In conclusion, Internet paranoid parents fail in every way possible. If you really want to keep your kids ’safe’ (HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!)  get off your ass and take the time to learn about what you’re protecting them from.

Your very mean friend,

-Sithus

~ by sithus on February 23, 2008.